This is my entry to this year's Record Producing Month Challenge. As per the rules, I started from scratch on February 1st, wrote, recorded and mixed everything before February 28th.
This is an autobiographical concept album, a story about my ongoing battle with depression.
Recorded in my studio apartment in Stockholm.
Personnel
- Yasa Akbulut
- Crippling Depression
Tracks
The Lizard
[Narrator]:
The Lizard watching you from above
Poisonous thoughts on your mind
A blessing or a curse?
Things are about to get worse
The Mountain Fairy
[Me]:
Going to the mountain
Gonna leave it all behind
Met an old man, He said
“Boy, hear me out and you will be fine”
And he said:
“Have you heard of the mountain fairy?
She will make you blue and weary”
“Many have gone up but
No one ever came down”, he said
I said “Old man, step aside and shut up
I'll prove you wrong”
And he said:
“Have you heard of the mountain fairy?
She will make you blue and weary”
He stepped aside, laughed and said
“Boy, we shall see”
As I walked away, I realised
That old man was me!
Have you heard of the mountain fairy?
The Path
[Me]:
Fiends and burdens lie ahead
Memories and words fill my head
A three-legged dog leads the way
The Golden Path, carry me away
The Lizard and The Snake are on my tail
Dread fills me but I cannot bail
I'd rather vanish than be bound
I'm lost but don't want to be bound
The path keeps winding
My feet keep climbing
The sound in the distance, inviting
So inviting…
The stones are sharp, feet bleeding
Nearby I see vultures feeding
I must go on until I'm at the top
Besides, I'm not sure if I could stop
The path keeps winding
My feet keep climbing
The sound in the distance, inviting
So inviting…
[The Old Man]:
Young boy, I tried to warn you, did not listen to me
Gotta climb and see for yourself, so careless and free!
The sound in the distance is The Fairy's siren song
And now you're under her spell, to her you shall belong!
Was that her plan all along?
The Snake must be her spy
What are you gonna do to survive?
You're at her mercy now
Yeah, you're gonna die now!
The Night
[Me]:
Thinking
How far I came
And how far I have to go
Under the red sky
I decide to stop
For the night
I got this feeling
That I have still
A thousand miles to go
And I start drifting
Away from here
The night draws near
[The Snake]:
I leave a trail of bloody memories wherever I may crawl
The crippling doubt, the paralysing fear and the wall
The one you think you need to build to avoid heartache
It's all my bidding, son, for I'm The Snake
Lay thine eyes upon the fields of ashes and bones
The screams, whines and last breaths are all just tones
For my symphony dedicated to her and her domain
I will bring souls up here until none remain
[Me]:
Daylight, it seems
I keep having these dreams
The screams, the schemes
Wonder what it means?
I thought I'd be
At least somewhat free
The reality
Splitting at the seams!
I now see
What The Old Man believes
About her
The Encounter
[Instrumental]
The Awakening
[Narrator]:
Her presence is gone but the smoke hasn't cleared yet
[Me]:
I don't understand
How could that be
What she was holding in her hand
Was a piece of me
The piece to make me complete
Make everything come together
It doesn't matter now
Cause she seems to be gone forever
In a puddle I see
A reflection of me
So many lines that weren't there before
My soul feels sore
Is this blood that I'm tasting?
Is that all I got for the days I've been wasting?
Beaten, bruised and left for dead
Utterly confused and filled with dread
[Narrator]:
The smoke begins to clear
[Me]:
The trembling in my bones
Is it the fear, or the cold?
Or maybe the uncertainty
Don't know where I am or where I'll be
Every joint in my body is aching
But now I won't be breaking
Not after all I have been through
And this feeling of déjà-vu
I get up and stand tall
I came this far after all
I hear a strange voice from within
“Just move forward, that is how we will win”
I put one foot in front of the other
Stepping through rotten remains
Of the ones that didn't bother
Courage starts running through my veins
The smoke is all gone now
And the summit is in plain view
Nothing to do but to carry on now
And see myself follow through
I get faster with every step
The slope shakes with fear
For it is no match for my pep
All my worries disappear